Day by Day, Moment by Moment

Thanks for all the blog comments, e-mails, and facebook comments (haven't had time to get on FB to read those ones)!

We had a decent night last night. Jared and I took Lilly out in the evening to buy some food for the room and grab dinner out, while Tom stayed back to nurse Anna, who was now not just having diarrhea but also vomiting. Lilly was really hungry as we walked the streets to buy fruit and crackers and things, so we quickly got into a restaurant and got her some noodles. Jared got some pizza--his staple the past few days.

She was pretty easy to put to bed last night after such a long and tiring day. It was very obvious very quickly last night that she truly does prefer her crib, just as they had told us in her updates. She slept fitfully from 9pm until about 3am then slept HARD till about 7:30. She would cry out for her nanny, and I would respond to offer comfort and take her to the bathroom. I think all the comfort she gained from eating almost nonstop yesterday resulted in lots of BMs last night during the night. Guess it's a trade off. I am trying to slow down her eating today and use it more for eye contact and bonding, so her digestive tract has some time to catch up.

Mealtimes are certainly the most pleasant times with her. She continues to grieve, though not asking so much for ayi (still not calling me mama either). She is definitely the most spirited of our group, throwing a full-on kicking and screaming tantrum as we walked back from the notary's office this morning. I think the main problem is that she REALLY had to use the bathroom and was really upset that we weren't stopping to go. Once we quickly got back to the room, used the restroom (she DID have to go, bad!), and started on some noodle soup and crackers, all was well again. I am so thankful I am starting to recognize her own words for poop, pee, and eat (she has a slightly different accent/dialect than standard Mandarin). She does seem to understand my Chinese, and I am using a mixture of Chinese, English, and sign language with her. If I say "give the cracker to Daddy" she'll walk over to Tom and offer him one. It's really cute to hear her say xie xie (thank you) and bu xie (you're welcome)! Her well-developed whine (a survival skill I pray she will quikly realizes she no longer needs) is not nearly so pleasant.

She is napping (praise God!) as I type. I think we might forego the group trip to the Lotus Center for shopping to keep things as low-key as possible.

I have to say these past two days have been both the most exhilirating and most difficult two days i have ever lived. As we walked back from the office with a writhing, screaming Lilly, getting stares from the many Chinese we passed, our new friend Shane said "God gives you what He knows you can handle!" I don't feel strong enough. But by His grace we will make it. Her spunk and her Spirit are what has helped her survive this far, and I know they will get her through.

I know I mentioned she is tiny. The 18 month clothing I brought falls off of her. She is so very scrawny, and Tom suspects that her scoliosis is compromising her cardiac and liver functions, so she cannot grow well. It is obvious that she works hard to breathe as well, as her lungs are somewhat squished. It will be very good to get her home and get an MRI so we know how to proceed.

Enough for now. She has awakened so I'll stop here. Love you all!